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Lost soul - Меня зовут Тролль, Диматролль
September 14th, 2003
04:07 pm

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Lost soul
For those who followed - the frat turned me down. I guess I really don't know how to be prefessionally social with people. To prove that, today my friend told me that I usually drift out in the conversations. I was helping her move a washing machine and a dryer today and she told me that her housemates had a concern about me. Last time I was there, they invited me over for dinner and I was the only guy there with six girls. As I found out today, they percieved me to not be there with them, rather I was in my own La-la land and not fully participating in the conversations. That I do find to be true. I rarely participate in parties and big get-together things. I must have missed some important social development level in my childhood. Maybe that is why most of my relationships are so much screwed up. I know how people work and how to work people, but once I try to work myself I pathetically fail at it. That is probably why so many people feel awkward in different times of interacting with me. And I know they do. Not all the time, but I think that almost everyone I know have at least one thing in me that makes them feel awkward or uncomfortable. Isn't that a good reason for me to become a hermit? Those girls whom I moved the washer and dryer for inviting me for dinner tonight. I am not going to go. They also asked me to come any time next week - I will do my best to not go. And I know that they want me to come, and they will take offense if I don't, but I really don't know what to do there if I go. There or anywhere else. Now I need to go and do some work. Though most likely I will just fall asleep.

Current Mood: sleepysleepy

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From:emidala
Date:September 15th, 2003 08:19 am (UTC)
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Deema you are not making any sense and that is profoundly wrong. You are a very likable person and a very good friend, and I have never in my life felt awkward while interacting with you. You are being silly and you know it. You are DeemaTroll, the one and only.
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